[ Cheers and applause ]
-This is our sixth annual celebration
of International Women's Day and, indeed,
my honor to kick it off.
And I, of course,
want to thank -- as Sarah and Janell Morgan Ndegwa --
I want to make sure I say Janell's name right.
They -- they are the co-chairs,
and the planning committee just did outstanding work.
I'm sure all of you last night,
as you looked at the snow in some areas are thinking,
"Oh, is this going to happen?"
And, indeed, we got a little break and the planning
that went into this was just outstanding.
I'm going to say just a few words about
why I think this is so critical,
and then I want to introduce the two speakers
that will follow me.
I want to start off with a quote by Maya Angelou,
poet and author and civil rights activist.
And she said,
"Each time a woman stands up for herself,
without knowing it possibly, even without claiming it,
she stands up for all women."
And what I take away from that is that a lot of your resilience
and your beauty and your brilliance,
sometimes it's not even intentional.
Just by being present and being present today,
telling the city, the entire city that, indeed,
your rights, your daughters' rights,
your grandmothers' rights,
are critically important and to never be taken for granted.
Seattle has been shaped by the work of countless resilient,
strong women, and we could go through all the rank and file
from council members to firefighters
to city light line women
and so many more who are invaluable to our city.
Many of you are in jobs
that perhaps were gendered-favored
in historical years,
and we recognize that as we try to break through barriers.
We recently lost a trailblazing woman in Peggy Maxie,
and some of you know who she was --
the first Black woman to be elected
to the Washington State Legislature.
I happen to know her family well.
I had the honor to visit her a few weeks ago
before she passed in the hospital,
and it's people like Peggy Maxie that, indeed, pave the way.
She particularly fought for fair representation
for the Central District,
and helped create an equal rights amendment
for our state constitution,
making Washington one of the first states
to ratify a gender equity amendment.
That was, indeed, trailblazing work.
While we clearly have made a lot of work toward gender equity,
we know that we're scratching the surface still.
This work is not to be, again, taken for granted.
It has to be extremely intentional
and that's why, again, on the sixth anniversary,
if you will, or sixth event like this,
we have to keep doing it
and keep doing it to reassure ourselves
that we have the energy to keep this fight alive.
There are over 215,000 women in businesses in Washington State
generating roughly $33 billion in revenue each year.
A lot of people want to know
why I do the work for minority and women
in businesses because,
indeed, they are the lifeblood
as everyone tries to compete against the monolithic giants.
I always say that it's truly the small businesses
and the entrepreneurs of the world
that will make us not only sane
but allow us to hire from our communities,
recycle our money here and give that -- sort of,
that rhythm, that vibe,
if you will, into a city that's equally important.
So as we talk about how we, throughout the day,
operationalize equity and inclusion,
not just on paper but through our action,
I'm -- I'm -- I looked at the -- the who's who in speakers
and I think you're going to be -- indeed,
going to be in store for a -- a rare treat.
Now let me talk about the two speakers
that you're about to hear. One is very easy to introduce.
That would be my wife.
But I want to start off with Deputy Mayor Adiam Emery
who many of you know.
Part of her portfolio as a Deputy Mayor is helping define
and implement our One Seattle Vision for a healthy,
accessible, welcoming, and sustainable community.
Her personal story is a refugee who came to the United States
for an education and opportunity.
She understands and advocates for the needs of Seattle's
immigrant communities as well.
Before joining our Mayor's Office --
I sort of plucked her to be a Deputy Mayor --
she was a Division Director for Transportation Operations
for Seattle's Department of Transportation
and oversaw policies to strengthen safety
and align transit-orien--
oriented development with the City's equity values.
This was not in the introduction.
I actually met Deputy Mayor Emery
when we were working on the privacy surveillance ordinance
when I was on the City Council and, quite honestly,
I just was --
I admired how you commanded the attention of everyone.
And, again, this is a very male-dominated meeting.
I don't know why -- it just happened to be --
and I had no way of knowing
when I first walked in the room
many years ago who was in charge.
I mean, you know, it's not
like anyone had a title in front of them.
And I listened to -- this person spoke and this person,
and you -- you didn't initially --
you weren't the loudest person in the room.
And I heard this opinion and that opinion.
There was another council member
and they were trying to work through these
very critical issues on how we deal with technology,
but how we protect your privacy rights.
And then when Deputy Mayor Emery opened her mouth
and started to actually lead us, if you will --
if I'm going to be candid with you -- I saw her brilliance.
And then I said if I'm ever so honored to be Mayor,
I know how to tap into talent and,
indeed, you led those discussions.
So that's Adiam Emery.
Now I'm going to talk about Joanne Harrell.
What you see in her bio is, indeed, an impressive resume.
Certainly dwarfs mine, and I say that in all seriousness.
I was just a football player in college,
but she was studying business and communications.
And I said, well, I'm probably going to be broke
with all the things I'm gonna do.
I need a person
that really I could just sort of grab onto those coattails
and ride it all the way up there.
We met in college at the University of Washington.
As a professional, she is a retired senior director
of the Artificial Intelligence, Sustainability,
and Market Development Strategy at Microsoft
where she worked from 2001 to 2021 when she retired.
She also was appointed to the University of Washington
as a Board of Regent from 2009 to 2020.
She served as the Board Chair for 2012 to 2013.
And she's the founding member
of the Board of Regents Diversity, Equity,
and Inclusion Advisory Committee.
She also shares the Board of Equal Opportunity Schools
which is a national organization working
with public school systems to optimize
and -- and -- optimize the ability for all of the students.
And she also serves at the Board of Directors
for the Fred Hutchinson Cancer -- Cancer Center,
indeed, one of our superstar organizations here
in cancer research.
And she serves on the board of HomeStreet Bank as well.
She also is a past -- no wonder I can't get ahold of you,
as I'm looking at all of this stuff you're doing.
She's also the past University of Washington
Foster Business School Fritzky Endowed Leadership Chair
and continues to serve as a member
of the University of Washington
Regent Advisory Committee on Real Estate.
Now that's in her resume.
What I do want to say in --
in closing is this -- is I met Joanne when we were in college
and I played basketball with her brother
and -- and we started working telecomm together back
in the early '80s.
We've been together for many decades.
And, as a woman and as an African-American woman,
I wish I had a nickel for every time
I saw her receive a microaggression
or just blatant disrespect.
I'll just tell you two short stories.
One is when I actually first got elected,
I thought this was unusual.
I was the managing partner of a downtown law firm
and we're going to do the swearing in in my office.
And Joanne was -- we were dressed down that day.
I was getting ready to leave the firm and come to city hall,
and we had on jeans.
Well, we had on jeans,
and a lady came up to me -- and the few people there
to do the swearing in.
She looked at Joanne. She said, "Oh!
This must be your secretary."
And I said, "Ah, no -- but why would you think that?"
And we had that discussion and Joanne,
just as classy as she could be,
just sort of played it off a little bit
and I was a little upset.
Probably more upset than I should have been.
Another example would be when I first got elected as mayor
a couple of years ago, we were at an event.
I'm sitting here and Joanne is sitting right here,
and a guy wanted to shake my hand.
And he was sort of a big shot where we were.
And he reached across and I'm telling you --
his armpit was, like, two inches from her face
and he was reaching in front of me like this.
And I'm looking. I'm thinking, "Who does that?"
And for those that know me, I would say,
"Hey, man, your armpit is in my wife's face right here!
Right?
And I don't think you would have done
that if that was his mother sitting right there."
I just gave you two, sort of, playful examples,
but I think one reason why Joanne is --
why I admire her so much is she truly is my rock.
And, you know, she usually wakes up before me
and she'll send me almost every morning some kind of text,
some kind of article.
She reads the Wall Street Journal.
She reads The New York Times.
She reads newspaper after newspaper.
She's extremely well read.
And she's had some -- some -- you know, she lost her mother --
she'll talk about that -- at a young age.
And her father, who was a vet,
raised her -- spit and polish kind of person
in terms of how he lived his life.
He was a disciplined kind of person.
And her drive, I think, being just a young girl,
just twelve or thirteen years old,
losing her mother, being raised by her father and her siblings.
Her drive, to me, is just -- always has been my inspiration.
And so I jokingly say her -- her resume --
mine pales in comparison to hers.
And I'm very serious when I say that I truly did marry up.
I'm not -- I'm not -- I'm not ashamed to say that.
So I present to you
Deputy Mayor Adiam Emery and First Lady Joanne Harrell.
-Well, I thought I would start off.
The Mayor talked a little bit about my background
and I wanted to share, First Lady.
This is what a prestigious moment is for me,
to be able to sit next to you
and have a dialogue which I just cherish --
every moment -- every time I'm around you.
So I'm just so grateful and just -- just happy to be here.
But I wanted to start off by what this reminds me of.
Right?
You know, I wanted to share a little bit of culture
from Ethiopia, where I'm from.
The women have this -- what we call coffee ceremony.
So -- in the coffee ceremony we have sweets, treats,
we roast the coffee from scratch,
and it's a way
in which traditionally the women have gathered.
They take turns in hosting the ceremony,
and it's a way in which they created a supporting system
for them to interact.
They're usually stay-at-home moms,
and my mom was one of them,
where she took turn in hosting women in our neighborhood
for this -- coffee ceremony.
And in that space are places
where I heard valuable things as a child,
and I also saw a network of women connecting
at the lowest level.
Right?
You know, just congregating on a daily basis
to create that support system, and it meant a lot to me.
And it also helped me identify how my identity, my history,
where I come from, continues to shape me as a leader,
as a woman, as a mother.
So I thought I would start off with a question
to you, First Lady.
How do you identify yourself?
-First of all, thanks for that question, Adiam.
Deputy Mayor -- Mayor Adiam.
I will call her Adiam. We're friends as well.
-Mm-hmm.
-And I'll answer that in just a minute.
First of all, I want to start off
and I want to affirm this audience.
I want to tell you how beautiful I think it is
to see you here in present,
and I know that there are a lot of people who are online.
And just to thank you for your energy and commitment to women
because what that means is that you're about helping each other.
And in order for the world to change, we need you.
We need each other -- all of us. And for those of you
who are online and can't see the faces of the audience,
this is a diverse audience.
And so what it says to me is that you care about each other
and each others' cultures and communities.
And that's how we lift each other up.
So I'll start with that first -- to affirm you and to thank you.
So in terms of how I identify myself,
my husband gave a little bit of information about that,
but I do think that -- and -- and I will tell you that Adiam
and I have talked about some of the questions
that came in early.
And so -- and as I think about what I've seen on the questions,
what I want you to know is, well, first of all
a couple of things -- the way I see the world.
I am from, as my husband said, a military family.
My father was a career military man.
That's how we moved out here.
My family is from Washington, DC.
So East Coast,
which in some ways can be a little more structured.
Right?
We're a little less formal out here, and I appreciate that.
The other aspect of myself
and my self-definition is that I do not hear well.
I wear hearing aids.
It's a genetic issue in my family.
And so when I define myself,
and even as I looked at some of the questions
that came in about race and gender,
I also thought about the invisible ways
that we're differently abled.
I don't like the word "disabled,"
because with my hearing aids I hear quite well.
But as a child I did not,
and so I always had to sit in the front of the class.
I'm very conscious of that. Right?
The ways that we're differently abled that we're not aware of.
And that crosses all genders and all races as well.
So that's another one.
The other thing is in terms of being a minority.
So you may not know this, but among Christians,
Black Catholic people,
African-Americans are 6% of Catholics --
actually 4% of Catholics -- and 6% of African-Americans.
That's minority within a minority.
My family was very Catholic.
My grandparents founded a church in Washington, DC.
My great grandparents did.
That's still there.
And then the other thing is, being a military child,
how many of you are military children?
-Whoo! Okay. Great. Great.
So you'll understand what I'll say here.
Growing up, living in different parts of the world --
right? -- you learn.
And moving around, you learn to embrace others quickly.
Right? There's a good and there's a bad.
Right?
There's the pain of leaving,
but there's also learning how to reach out to others.
And that's very much a part of me.
My father was a decorated war veteran.
My parents are buried in Arlington National Cemetery.
So when I go to DC, which is my hometown as I said,
I very often go to Arlington.
I am a proud American. And I want to say that
because so often we see the flag used in ways
that -- that are --
that make us feel that it belongs to one group.
But I am a true patriot. I love our country.
I'm proud to be an American woman.
I am an African-American woman.
But that also means that, as an American,
I embrace all cultures.
Right? All of your -- all of those cultures.
And in Seattle all of our cultures are important,
whether you're, you know, Scandinavian, or Native,
or African-American,
because that's what makes us One Seattle, which I believe in.
Okay. -That's wonderful.
I just love the diversity
and how you talked about every experience,
you know, continues to shape you.
And I -- I feel the same way, too.
-Yes.
-I come all the way from Ethiopia.
At age 19, I came here to school.
-Mm-hmm.
-It was a -- a little bit fearful.
-Yeah.
-You know, I was away from home -- far, far away.
-Yes.
-I couldn't go back home to do laundry.
-Yes. -It was oceans away. Right?
And so -- and I -- I see as a leader
those experiences continue to shape me.
-Yeah.
-I am one out of eight children,
so collaborative space... -Yes.
-...means a lot to me
'cause that -- those are the skills that I set up.
So with those diverse background experiences,
how do you actively communicate with women
to make them feel included?
And if you could specifically talk about --
as a woman of color in the workplace,
are there special ways in which to lift up other women?
Just experiences that you can share in that space.
-Yes. For sure.
So I do think that lifting up other women is critical.
And, you know, we --
we hear about mentoring in particular as one way.
But I also think sponsorship is another
and that's identifying women for roles.
And most of the time when someone sponsors you,
you don't even know that it's being done.
Right?
There are organizations -- I mean,
I fortunately right now have access to lots
of groups and lots of organizations.
And so I'm consciously thinking of people
that I can -- I -- names that I can bring forward.
What I will say, too,
is that, well, the other thing that Bruce didn't tell you
is that I'm on
the Board of the Washington State Chapter
of the International Women's Forum which,
if you look it up,
is a wonderful organization of about eight thousand women
around the world -- leaders.
And our state chapter has about 250 members --
a great organization.
I'll say from a leadership perspective that --
so the first thing for me is --
I think my husband would say that I have a pretty thick skin.
Right?
Some of the things that people might think of
as microaggressions I probably don't even see.
Right? So that's the first thing.
I'm not -- I'm not as sensitive and -- you know,
and some of this comes from -- you know, I had a -- my --
as my husband said, my mother -- well, you don't know this,
but my mother was a teacher.
She passed away from an aneurysm when --
when I was about eleven or twelve.
And very blessed to have --
have -- have had her and my father
instill a very strong sense of confidence.
Right?
And so that feeling of -- you know,
I've talked with lots of groups of women -- imposter syndrome.
Right? A feeling of "Do I belong?
Am I comfortable?" Right?
I was forced to deal with a lot of that early.
But that didn't make me insensitive
to what my sisters feel. Right?
And that crosses race, definitely, and culture and --
and what I've always tried to do is be active in --
in the women's movement.
Right? And I still am.
And from a workplace standpoint,
I'm also very comfortable speaking up when I see things
that are not right.
For instance, as a leader,
one thing that leaders can do --
and Bruce actually mentioned this when he mentioned Adiam,
that when he talked about that meeting
that -- that meeting that he was in with you,
that it's important for us
as leaders to make sure that we stop and ask
and listen to the voices that don't talk all the time.
Right?
And, I mean, when I was at Microsoft in my last job,
women were 6.67% -- according to Forbes Magazine --
of the job title level that I was in.
Right? So 93% of the time, I was in meetings with all men.
Right?
And so -- you know, so in a scenario like that,
yes, the organization needs to be sensitive.
But we as individuals also have to empower ourselves
and believe that we have a right to be there.
Right? So that's that internal confidence.
So it's sort of meeting in the middle.
Right?
The organization -- we need to -- we,
as women need to soften the organizations.
As leaders we need to make sure we're listening
and that we're being inclusive.
And we each,
just like you're in this room today and those who are online
who are leaning in,
right, we have to make sure that we make our voices heard.
That's the other part of it.
-Love it. I love it. Absolutely.
Keep your light --
your internal light shining constantly and you -- you're,
yourself, your own advocate. And I -- I remember, like,
the first fifteen years of my career
in the Seattle Department of Transportation,
I was the only Black woman engineer -- for fifteen years.
-Yeah.
-And it was a very lonely place.
But I had to figure out how I create support system.
And also internally I -- I call it a reset value.
And it's, you know, I --
I have to constantly tag that reset button to make sure
that I, you know, validate myself.
Right?
And so -- so, knowing what you know,
and you've talked a lot about, like, you know,
ways in which to empower women, what are some of the ways
in which women can tackle the challenges
and come up from a strength position...
-Yes. -...in the workplace?
-Yes. That is a great question.
And, as I thought about a version of that question
that I received earlier, I mean, there are so many ways.
But I think I've touched on the first one.
And, you know, there's another question, too,
that I always ask myself.
And that is, "What message do I really want to leave with you?"
And I think one way is to remember
that whatever it is that you see on the other side --
so let's say the Mayor walks in. Right?
And he walks by you and he doesn't say anything.
Right? That's not about you. Right?
He's probably thinking about something else or whatever.
So the first thing that I say is remember it's not personal.
Right? It's really not personal.
So often what happens is indicative of the other person.
Right?
But what we do is we internalize it.
Oh, you know -- or -- and --
and, especially, let's say you had a meeting with him,
you know, a week ago.
Right?
And there's one or two things that didn't go quite right
or questions you wish you had answered differently.
That's always the way it is.
Right? Just remember that it's not about you.
Right?
That -- whatever it is,
generally it's about the other person.
I think the other thing, too, that I was --
as I was thinking about this is that this notion of leaning in
and the -- the question of --
and what I mean by "leaning in" is
when I look at most of the really great opportunities
in my life, they've happened because I reached out
or I connected to someone to help them in what they're doing.
Right?
So my husband talk -- didn't talk about my career
at the telephone company, but -- with U.S. West/AT&T.
But what I would say there is that I ended up volunteering
to work on a community program.
So that's the other thing.
When there are opportunities
to engage with your colleagues, do it.
Right? I worked on this program.
I ended up designing this initiative
and I said I'd, you know, lead it.
Our company won a Presidential Citation
for Outstanding Community Development Work.
Right?
I didn't know it was my company president's dream
to go to the White House and be recognized.
Right? This was a conservative White man from Eastern Oregon.
I was on that plane with him for a day.
He asked me to go with him and, I'll tell you,
he became the best mentor that I have ever had in my life.
So what I'm saying is -- lean in and --
and think about the other person
and what they might need instead of yourself.
Right? That's the thing. Good deeds really do help,
and when you help someone else on something
that they care about,
it comes back to you
and you're not even trying to have it come back.
So -- okay.
-And I just want to take a moment
how to speak a lot about you,
your generosity in terms of your time.
You know, for the time that I've known First Lady,
you've been -- you're a very generous and graceful person.
You give your time to people.
You stop and connect with folks,
and I'm one of the privileged people
that you've connected with, which I completely appreciate.
So with that theme,
can you share an --
an inspirational moment
that have helped you to guide your path,
to push through a career in education and technology?
-Yes.
So -- and this is -- this is another one.
I thought about it, and it goes way back.
When our family moved here when I was in high school,
and I was a very good math student.
Right?
And I remember I was in my calculus class.
I was the only African-American person in there.
There weren't that many girls.
And I remember we were still new,
and I raised my hand to answer a question.
I was feeling very tentative.
And the teacher didn't call on me.
And I went home to my father and I said,
"Daddy, why do I have to go to that school?
Why do I -- blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!"
He said to me -- he said, well --
and he asked me what happened and I explained.
I said well, he didn't call me.
He said, "Well, then, what that means is
you need to learn to make yourself heard."
Right?
He said, "Tomorrow when you go back,
if he doesn't call on you, then stand up and say, Mister" --
his -- you know, Mister blah, blah --
"Mister Cooper, I have an idea for that."
So then do it in a way that -- that's positive,
that's helpful to the class.
He said because you are not changing schools.
Right? You have to learn to deal with it.
And so -- and then the other thing he said is, again,
it's not personal.
But remember this, too,
that sometimes the people who seem most resistant,
as you work with them,
they're the ones that become your biggest supporters.
And so that stayed with me throughout my life
which is partly why I'm -- you know,
I think of myself as fairly resilient.
And -- you know, and again as I look at you and your careers.
Right? I've seen some heads nodding as I've spoken.
I think it comes back to that.
Don't let someone push you into a corner.
Right? Don't internalize that, oh, they did this to me.
Push forward.
We have this International Women's Day
because women pushed, because men pushed.
That's why we're here. Right? That's why you're here.
The City supported this. Men supported it.
Women.
And our Mayor supported it, who is a man.
So remember others are in the struggle with us,
but we have to do our part and stand up and be heard
and help each other.
-Beautiful. That's beautiful.
A great way to segue to -- questions -- the audience.
Yeah. So we have ten more minutes.
First Lady can take questions.
I'll take questions if you have questions,
but she has more interesting stories to tell.
[ Laughter ]
So are there any questions?
-I answered all of them. My goodness! Yes.
-Good morning.
What advice would you give your 20-year-old self?
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
But what advice would you give your 20-year-old self?
-Yeah. That's a really good question.
And so I'll just tell you about something about myself.
So I am a --
in the middle in terms of being introverted and extroverted.
Right?
I'm very task oriented,
so that drives me to be more extroverted.
But I do think that what I said earlier about engaging
is so important because once people get to know you.
Right?
Once they see who you are and the positive energy,
people are attracted to that.
You know that old saying -- you catch more,
you know, flies with sugar than with vinegar.
Right? -Yeah. Right?
I mean, that's -- let your light shine through.
Your good light. Your good energy.
Be embracing of everybody of every culture.
I mean, I'm a student of history.
Right? I know my history. Right?
Personal and from a cultural standpoint.
But you know what? I also know other history.
My husband is half Japanese. Right?
I know Japanese history, and Korean history,
and European history.
I recently went to the Nordic Museum.
Right? Why? Because that's Seattle history.
We live here. We need to understand.
And I wish I had known.
You know, this is something I've learned over my lifetime,
but -- but we're Seattleites. Your history is my history.
Our history is different. There's similarity.
Right? Your history is my history because we live here.
We share this space.
So I would say see the world in a more expansive way
outside of yourself.
Embrace others.
Go to the Wing Luke Museum if you haven't been there.
Go to the African-American Museum
if you haven't been there. Go to the Nordic Museum.
That's what I wish I had known earlier,
and I've learned it along the way
but I'm glad to share it with you.
It is so important. Lean into each other's culture.
Because this is our place, this city, this space is our space.
And it's this history of the people
who came here collectively that make it what it is now.
And that's -- and understanding
that is how we change that most effectively.
Good question. Thank you. -Yeah, I do have a question.
Very impressive -- all that you've done,
but is there -- oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah. It's very impressive -- all that you've done.
I'd like to know.
Is there something back in the back of your mind
that you still want to do?
Some area that you still want to get involved in,
you know, that inspires you, that pushes you forward?
-That's a good question, Allyn. A specific area --
I wouldn't say actually that there's a specific area.
I am committed -- very committed --
to supporting my husband in the work that he does.
As Adiam knows, there are initiatives
that I've been very engaged in.
Right? The Reach Out initiative is one, for sure.
The Liberty Project.
And then there are others.
Right?
The inner city visit to Detroit, for instance,
working with the Chamber.
So at this point in my life, you know, I'm --
I don't really have any career mountains to climb at all.
It's really --
I guess it's really about giving back and engaging.
You know, the role of the mayor is a pretty big job,
especially right now.
And, you know, working with him and helping him
as a part of his team, you know, as his wife, which I am.
I have his name.
You know, that's one question you haven't asked me
that a lot of audiences ask me --
and that is how do you as a woman who's,
you know, had her own career,
you know, suddenly you're under the name of -- of someone else.
Right? The shadow of. I don't see it that way.
Right? I've worked on every campaign he had.
I am committed to him being a great mayor
and I'm committed to doing everything that I can.
He didn't tell you that we have three children
who are grown adults who are, you know, off in their fields.
Each one has their master's degree in their field.
We have two granddaughters.
That's another thing I'm very committed to as well.
From a family standpoint,
doing everything I can to support them.
And to continue to learn.
My -- one of my main goals in life is to make sure that,
as I age, that I become even more open and less judgmental.
Right?
And more inclusive and more understanding.
And it -- it all -- it's all about love.
You'll hear Bruce talk about love.
But it's about being more loving.
And that's something that each one of us can strive for.
Right?
And that's why I say get out of our own worlds.
Get in.
Understand this place, these people who shaped it.
Because now we're shaping it,
and we'll want them in the future to understand us.
So thanks for the question, Allyn.
I appreciate it.
-First Lady, we do have a --
a question online from our online audience,
and I believe Julia is going to read the question for you.
-Yeah. First Lady Harrell. Thanks for this great question.
How important is legacy to you,
and what legacy do you hope to leave?
-That's a good one.
So I think that legacy comes through the life that's lived.
My life goal is to leave the world better through the love
I share, the example I set, and consistently giving my best.
Right? What does love look like?
Love looks like us being in this room together.
Right? There are other things I could have been doing today.
Right? I missed my yoga class. Right?
There's -- there's the desire to connect
and to do that and share when I can.
Right? Example? I am the First Lady.
Right? I'm very conscious of the example I set.
Like, for instance, as a Black woman.
Right?
But as a woman, my hair is not dyed.
That was a conscious decision. Right?
After sitting in a room at Microsoft with seventeen men
and three women, all in the same age group,
all of us had our hair dyed.
Not a man in there did.
I looked and I thought,
"Why do I have to do this when I don't want to?"
And I stopped. Right?
The women in here who have curly hair or kinky
or coily hair will understand from an example standpoint.
I decided I'm not going to straighten it any more.
I don't want to put chemicals in it any more.
Right? That's some issues.
I can't tell you how many young people look at me
and just do like this and nod -- right?
So it's the example.
And consistently doing my best.
Right? I mean, I see the heads nodding.
Just do the best we can,
not just for ourselves but for others -- to help others.
Right? Adiam put a lot of work into this today.
Right? And -- and trying to be ready?
Why? Because she cares about you.
Right? To do a good job. That's what that's about.
It's not about me. It's about helping others.
And it all comes down to sharing our love,
our gifts, our talents,
to make the world better and to help others.
That's what Bruce does.
There are lots of things
our Mayor could have done from a career standpoint.
Trust me -- I know this. Right? But he chose to do this,
and he's always told me that he wanted to help others.
So that's what I'm about.
I don't think about the conscious legacy.
I want people to remember me for this and that and that.
Because, over time, most of us, you know, our names fade.
And that's fine.
But through my children, through the people I touch,
to the people I --
that I shape or impart an idea or help along the way,
that's what a legacy is. That's how I define my legacy.
-That's very powerful. Very powerful.
One last -- last question?
Two?
-We have lots of time for questions.
-We do! Great! Okay. Back there.
-What role has self trust played in -- in your journey?
-Okay.
So self trust -- that's an interesting one.
I haven't heard it displayed that --
or conveyed -- communicated quite that way.
I take self trust to mean confidence.
Right? The belief in oneself.
I was very fortunate, like I said earlier,
my mother told me, my father, my family, you are smart.
Right? So I've never doubted my intelligence.
Nobody can ever -- could ever take that.
When I was in the sixth grade, I went through these --
you know, I was in a school system
where they put you in tracts.
And I went through this set of tests
and my principal and counselor called me in
and said, you know, there's nothing you can't learn.
Right? You are really smart.
So I was in a high --
in a -- and so that belief in my intelligence
and the affirmation --
and I had a father -- I have a sister, right,
who was my dearest friend other than my husband.
And my father expected the same thing.
And I have two -- two brothers.
The same thing from his daughters as he did his sons.
Just like my husband.
We have two sons and one daughter.
Expected the same thing from our daughter that he did our sons.
Right.
And so self trust, for me, goes --
it's a foundational thing.
Right?
But that doesn't mean that those of you
who grew up not having that can't get it -- because you can.
It's the -- it's the affirming.
It's the making sure --
to make sure that you're around positive people.
Right?
One other thing I'll impart to you along the --
since you asked this question,
one thing that I believe that I learned is --
avoid the unlucky and the unhappy
because their misery is infectious.
So you have to be careful because there are others who --
because maybe they're not happy inside.
Right? They can infect you with -- you know, with malaise.
So that's the other thing.
You know, we -- we -- we have to be conscious of what's around us
and constantly refill our bucket by knowing ourselves.
Did I answer your question?
Okay. Thank you.
-Miss Barbara -- yeah!
Sorry. And I'll come to you next.
-...teacher -- we speak very loudly.
First, I've known you for quite some time
and I would just like to say you are inspirational to me...
-Thank you.
-...and I know I can speak for the other ladies here.
Thank you.
-You gave us some wisdom, some thought,
that we will take from here. Thank you.
-And I would just like to say --
and I've known her and her husband for some time.
Yes. Yes.
-So I'd just like to say thank you.
Thank you. -Thank you so much.
-Thanks for your affirmation. I appreciate it.
Thank you.
[ Applause ]
-Thank you. My question is about balance.
You've -- when you talk about the many hats you wear --
mother -- I'm a single mom.
Grade age kids -- I started late.
I'm in my fifties.
I have young kids, career in IT, several boards.
Just how do you balance that
because some days I just feel like, you know,
the motherhood thing -- I don't want to raise messed up kids.
And I need to focus on that.
But I want to spread love in the world.
I want to, you know, give back, and you do all these things.
Just talk -- talk to us about balancing
all these hats and being the wife,
the First Lady, wife of the Mayor.
Thank you. -That's a very good question.
So -- oh, there are so many things
that go through my head there.
It's a few things that people told me
when my children were young. One person --
actually Jeff Brotman who was the founder of Costco told me.
He said, "Joanne, remember one thing.
You will only be as happy as your least happy child."
-That is true! Your least happy child.
I remember thinking, oh God, I've got three!
I'd better focus.
And -- so that was one thing,
and that was one thing that made me focus.
I don't -- I don't want to say a negative did,
but it stayed in my head.
That was one thing.
The second thing is that it's hard to have everything
at the same time.
Right? It's hard to feel balanced when you're stressed.
Right?
And the reality is we only have so much bandwidth.
Right?
And so what I say on that is that --
like I said, I think it's priority.
I think that the children -- or at least in my head,
right, my children had to be my priority.
But I also -- we were fortunate to have our lives set up
so that Bruce's mother,
who retired as an accountant with the library system here,
helped us.
I mean, she retired so she could be supportive of us.
So that's the other thing.
When you can design in your support systems.
Right?
And, as mothers, certainly when it's your mother-in-law,
you know, sometimes it's hard to be as close.
Right?
But she was, you know, small Japanese lady,
one of my most dearest friends in life.
So that's not -- that's a -- you know,
that's not an exact prescription,
but I would say focus.
I think that at the end of the day,
for -- for us as women, we get judged on our children.
Whether we like it or not, we do.
Right?
And so that's got to be a priority,
and that's even why we work, right,
so we can take care of them.
And they will -- they may not understand it all the time.
My daughter told me when she was a sophomore in college --
she came home from school -- but she says,
"Mom, you know, I was mad at you all the time."
I was thinking, "I know that!" Right?
She said, "I was mad at you all the time because you worked."
She said, "But now I understand and now I'm proud of you."
Right? So it doesn't happen all at once.
Right?
You know, we go through these hard times,
but keep your eye on -- on the prize,
on where you want to be with them, and you'll be fine.
-Well said. Well said. All right.
-Question.
-Thank you both for this amazing panel.
You spoke about sponsorship and mentorship
and I'm curious for you what it's been like
to identify mentors in your career,
and how to kind of make that ask of them,
but also how you've identified people
that you've wanted to give that to.
Yeah. There's a lot in that question.
Again, I've been really fortunate
that most of the great mentors in my life --
and I'm thinking of not just mentors but people
who have helped me and really helped me along the way
have been -- you know,
when you're in a company that, let's just say,
Microsoft is a different world.
It's a great company. Right? I'm very glad I was there.
And, yet, you know, there are hard times.
And -- and it's interesting because you never know
where the support will come from.
Right?
I mean, the -- I would say the top person
who was a mentor and sponsor
to me at Microsoft is a Latino man from Columbia,
an Executive Vice President.
Steve Ballmer brought me into the company.
But -- so -- and in each case, I did work for them.
Right?
When I was President of United Way of King County,
I got to know the Microsoft team.
And then I worked with my Columbian-American sponsor
because I did work for him. Right?
So once you do work with them,
then, you know, it's easier to lean in.
I find it easier to ask for mentorship with people
that I know -- people who know me.
But I do think it's --
I think that's really -- it's incredibly important.
Right?
And that's the other reason that I think
that it's important to --
to be helpful,
to engage in the ways that you can with the people
that you work with.
Right?
And to -- and the other thing I learned
is to know your boss's extended team.
Right?
Because those are the people who shape your careers,
who are sitting there in the room,
talking about opportunities.
Right? I mean, she could say yes -- she knows.
Talking about opportunities.
So reach out and get to know folks.
Be -- be that bright light in the room.
Hope -- I hope I gave you some points that are helpful.
Was that?
And you can ask me afterwards if you'd like to -- so.
-All righty. Any other questions?
-How y'all doing today?
-Good, thank you.
-Thank you for speaking
and -- and imparting to us your wisdom and your knowledge.
My question is -- you spoke about history.
Knowing what we know about history,
and what has led us to where we are today,
and being in the -- today's climate
where everything seems to be moving at a microwave pace.
Right?
How do we move forward and be on the other side of history,
right, knowing --
knowing now that it's a chess game what we're up against.
The resources that we have --
how do we now get in front of it
and change the narrative going forward
and for generations to come?
That's a huge question. -Yeah!
Yes, You're getting some hands on that.
So what I would say is that each one of us
is an individual in a community. Right?
Each one of us is powerful with one group or another.
Maybe it's your family. Maybe it's your children.
Maybe it's your church.
Maybe it's your -- maybe it's -- it's this group.
And so each of us has an opportunity and a right
and a privilege to try to drive change where we are.
So, for instance,
like I said, I mean, with my family,
I'm making sure that we all go to all the museums.
Right? Understand all of Seattle.
I'm taking Black folks to the Nordic Museum.
Right?
I mean, so each of us has to step forward to do our part,
and it comes back to International Women's Day.
Carry the message forward to other people who are not here,
to your daughters, to your sons. Right?
Each of us has to do our part to drive a vision
that -- that we believe in for the world that we want.
And, for me, it comes back to One Seattle.
Thanks for the question.
-That was a beautiful question.
I just want to add to that, too. Like, just being intentional.
When we are in leadership space, be intentional.
Provide folks opportunity.
Create space. Right? You know -- you know,
the First Lady talked about the diversity of,
like, thoughts and experiences
that come to a space that makes us all look whole and beautiful.
Right?
Or we create, like,
beautiful outcome because of our diverse experiences
or lived experiences.
And just be intentional. Give people opportunity.
The Mayor gave me opportunity.
I'm an engineer in politics, for crying out loud.
Right? It just does not make sense.
Right?
But somebody opened up that door.
-Yeah. -He saw me. Right?
When he talked about that --
being in that space of
when we were talking about the initiative of a,
you know, surveillance ordinance,
he saw what I could bring to the table.
-Yes.
-He saw my leadership skills being in that space,
not necessarily to occupy the space,
but provide, you know -- you know,
opportunity for my employees to showcase themselves.
-Yes.
-As a leader, I don't need to lead.
So be intentional.
That's how we change paths and outcomes.
So let's all engage.
Any other?
-One more, at least.
-Hi.
I work in Seattle IT, which is a male-dominated department.
And you have experience working in IT.
-Yes, I do.
-I find myself still after, like,
thirty years total in IT as sometimes the only woman,
or the only few women in the room,
spending too much time in my head trying to quiet myself down
or not worry about I'm taking up too much space in the room,
or I'm providing too many ideas, or asking too many questions.
And then after I get out of that situation,
again, I'm -- I'm in my head.
Like, I -- I talk too much.
I took up too much room.
And I don't think any of the male --
the people that identify as men are going through that --
that mental gymnastics.
And I'm just wondering if you --
what -- what have you done in your career
to kind of get out of your own head,
I guess, and just -- I don't know if it's like a trust
or just don't worry about what
other people are thinking and just be you?
I'm just wondering if you have any advice for
how to do that as a person who identifies as a woman?
That's really a good question because I think
that that's quite normal.
And I'll tell you, though, I was speaking to a group
and it was probably 60% male -- 70.
And -- but the --
but a woman had asked me a question similar to yours,
and she also talked about imposter syndrome.
And I've heard this question over and over.
And I asked the audience.
I said, "How many of you have this?"
Do you know that almost every man's hand went up?
So that's the first thing.
We always think, "Oh, I'm just the only one carrying this."
But the guys have it, too. Right?
I mean, I did see -- I thought I saw,
if there was -- the guy right there, right?
[ Laughter ]
I think you're a guy. Okay.
I want to be respectful. Have you ever had that?
I mean, as she was talking?
See? I didn't mean to put you on the spot, but -- but I did.
Right?
And there's another one there, too.
See? His head is nodding, too. Right?
So that's the first thing -- to realize that it's not just you.
And then the other thing I'm going to show you
that a Senior VP at Microsoft taught me in these rooms.
Right?
So -- okay, the first thing is --
when you're in a meeting, remember this.
You're there to make a point or two -- or a few.
If you don't say anything then you may as well not be there.
So -- what she taught me is she says, "Joanne,
when you--" -- and, again, 'cause you know, loud voices --
she said, "Joanne, learn to -- learn to do this.
When you're ready to make a point, you know, have a cup.
Right? And do like this. You know -- right?
And I mean, it -- it just so happens, you know,
and you just kind of -- and it -- it pulls it.
So that's one thing, too, for those of you
who tend to be the more quiet voices.
Right?
But the other thing is that the good news is
you know you're in your head. Right?
So since you know that, you've acknowledged it to all of us,
you've said it out loud.
Right? You know that you need to get out of your head.
Right?
I would say -- and I don't know what your peers
or your bosses look like,
or what your trust level is,
but make sure that you get some feedback after a meeting.
Get some real feedback from someone you trust.
Right?
Because odds are the points you are making
are exactly what are needed. Right?
But you're -- it's -- it's inside you.
This is what I'm saying.
Sometimes these voices, especially the negative voices,
are inside of our heads.
Look at -- look in the mirror and tell yourself --
when you look at yourself in the mirror.
Right? I'm in that meeting because I need to be.
I should be. My points are valid.
Talk to yourself. Talk to yourself.
Because you're probably on the right track.
Right?
How many of you think she's probably on the right track?
See?
[ Laughter ]
Good question. Thank you.
-That was a good one.
-We've got another one from the chat.
-Okay.
-First Lady,
what did you learn from losing your mother so very early
and can you expound --
can you expound on imposter syndrome a little
and how you got past it and learned to thrive from it?
Okay. So that's two questions. Two big questions.
So the first one in terms of losing my mother --
and I spoke at an organization called Safe Crossings
that's here in Seattle
that is focused specifically on young people
who have lost loved ones.
There is nothing more painful for a child
than to lose a parent or those of you who have lost --
who have lost siblings when you're young.
And what I will say is that --
one reason I mentioned being in a military family is that,
you know, I saw my father crying one time in my life,
and he was sitting at the table after my mother had passed away.
And he picked himself up and he just said, you know,
she told me what she wanted done and I'm going to do it.
Right?
And so out of that I learned resilience.
I learned faith. Right?
I learned that, you know, you have to focus forward.
You have to believe. You know?
You have to believe in the positive
and in all the messages that I was given
which were positive messages.
We need to see the blessings around us.
That's the other thing.
I told you I missed my yoga class today,
but one of the beautiful things of yoga is that,
you know, there's a centering.
And -- and when you're a child who goes through that,
you never lose it, but it also --
now that I'm older, it makes me very grateful for my life,
for the people around me.
So, I mean, that's a whole conversation.
Right?
But for those of you
who have children or are close to people who have lost people,
Safe Crossings is a wonderful organization here in Seattle.
And then imposter syndrome --
I mean, that's one from a lot of self talk.
Some of you may remember on Saturday Night Live
years ago there was a guy named Dana Carvey
and he'd stand in the mirror and he'd look at himself
and he'd say, you know, "I'm wonderful!
I'm magical! And people love me!" Right?
I mean, that's why I tell you -- self talk, it works.
Self talk really works.
And meaning it, that you've got it.
But the only way you get over it is that you get over it
because it's inside you.
That's the thing. It's inside you.
It's a barrier that you have.
It's just like when Adiam and I walked up those stairs,
right, we had to walk up the stairs ourselves,
and that's the way imposter syndrome is.
Right?
There are lots of ways to get over it,
but the main thing is that it's inside you.
It's your barrier.
Just like the guy said here, too -- they have it, too.
So it's -- confidence is -- is practice.
Right?
And -- and -- you know, and it -- and it's growth.
Over time, some of this stuff drops away.
That's the nice thing about getting older.
-Okay.
Two more minutes left to wrap up.
So -- last question.
If not, we can wrap it up early, too.
-Oh, there's someone.
-Oh, there's one. Great. Cody.
-Hi.
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
-Oh, I don't have a problem saying no.
I mean, I -- and I --
and I say that -- I don't say that lightly.
But I get a lot of requests to do a lot of things.
And some of which are very desirable, very interesting,
but I'm clear about what's important to me.
Right?
And -- and so -- you know, I -- I, you know,
have a rubric that I go through.
But I've learned to ask people,
"What is it that you really want?
What are you really looking for here?
Why do you want me to come?" Right?
Which can make some people uncomfortable,
but I am pretty direct because it's my time, it's my life.
Right?
And it was through that that we ended up with Reach Out.
Right?
One of the individuals reached out
and asked me to go on a tour of something
that I didn't think I needed to tour.
And so, you know,
through our conversation I realized what that focus was.
Right?
And out of that something good happened
which is our Reach Out initiative.
So it's just being clear about what's important and, remember,
we only have so much time. That's the other thing.
And the good thing is, you know,
I have a partner who understands me.
I mean, we've been married over three decades now.
He ought to.
And, you know, vice versa.
And so there's some things that -- and I do --
I -- I have a rubric,
a prioritization that I go through.
That's probably the best answer that I can give you.
But I'm not afraid to say no,
just like I'm not afraid to say yes.
Sometimes I say yes a little too much still though.
Good question. Thank you.
-Well, I just want to take a moment to thank you.
-Thank you.
-And this has been such a privilege,
so why don't you guys help me thank First Lady Joanne Harrell.
-Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
[ Cheers and applause ]